The gift of gab is not a gift. It’s a skill. Like other skills such as playing the guitar or driving a car, it can be learned. A big reason why many guys find dating and meeting women difficult is the whole conversation thing.

What do you say exactly? How do you start it in a way that seems relaxed and natural? How do you keep it going? And most important, how do you connect with this beautiful girl you’ve just met?

Knowing how to converse with anyone whether male or female is indispensable today. It’s usefulness isn’t limited to meeting women.

There’s things like job interviews, enjoying yourself at social gatherings, making friends, fitting in at work, getting new clients, etc., etc. The list is endless.
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In the mating game, men are expected to approach the girl. Given that a lot of women are already in relationships, how are we to know who to approach? The answer is that we should approach anyone that we have an interest in and be social.

If you’ve been practicing your social skills and have made it a habit of talking to new people, then there’s no reason why you can’t approach a girl just to be social. But how can you tell if a girl likes you? The answer is that when you’re talking to her you should be looking for signs of sexual interest in her body language.

If her body language tells you nothing, then your interaction with her remains strictly social. If her body is giving you clear signals that she’s sexually interested, you’ve got a green light to swing into action. Some women use body language deliberately, others aren’t even aware that their bodies are giving away their feelings of attraction.
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The first kiss can be an big stumbling block for a lot of men. If you’re on a date, it’s expected. On the other hand the lady that you’re dating has never been kissed by you before.

How will she react? Will she pull away? Maybe she’ll think that you’re coming on too strong and you’ll scare her away. These and other similar thoughts are very common.

Some guys will opt for not dealing with the issue at all and won’t make any attempt. Others will ask for permission. Both are mistakes for two reasons:
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Using advice is like taking medicine, take the wrong pill for what’s ailing you and you may find yourself worse off than before.

What I’m referring to is all of the relationship advice that’s available today. Trying to make sense of it all can make your head spin. If you’re trying to use this information for meeting and attracting women, you may be doing yourself more harm than good. Just because an article is about relating to women, it doesn’t mean that it will be useful to you.

You need to distinguish between advice for people who are already in a relationship and advice for attracting women. The two are completely different and they don’t mix very well.

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In in a previous post, I discussed how the wrong body language will kill your efforts at attracting girls. When you’ve mastered your body language, there is something else that can also defeat you: what your face is telling her.

The human face has a core set of five muscles that are used to convey the basic emotional states of happiness, anger, fear, surprise, sadness and disgust.

But there are up to 19 additional muscles that assist in conveying other emotions. Evolution has wired our brains to show our emotional states through these facial muscles.

Our facial expressions truly are a window into our soul. Unless you’re a trained actor, it’s very hard to cover up your feelings of the moment.

Most people are fairly good at reading facial expressions. However, women excel at this. If you’re out meeting women and you aren’t enjoying yourself, then you should save yourself the trouble and do something else.
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If you’re constantly telling yourself that you need to learn how to talk to girls, you’re approaching the problem the hard way. In fact, viewing it as a problem that has to be overcome will turn it into internal battle with yourself.

The harder you try to start a conversation with a girl, the more tense and nervous you’ll get. You might get the words out ok but the girl will immediately pick up on your nervousness and if she’s a stranger, it probably won’t turn out well.

A better way is not to take it seriously at all but instead look at it as being an exciting and fun game. Rather than telling yourself that you just got to figure out how to talk with girls, tell yourself that you’re going to learn how to be a really great flirt. See the difference? The second way is more empowering. It’s ambitious. Ambition is good.
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A lot of people are shy about meeting new people. Add to this the normal discomfort that people feel on their first dates and it’s easy to see why keeping the conversation flowing on your first date can be a real challenge. Here’s a few pointers to help with this:

1.) Focus and remember. At the beginning when she’s talking about some general things about herself such as her interests, likes, dislikes, etc, you need to focus on and remember anything said that was unusual or that she had strong feelings about.

Also remember anything that you are genuinely curious about. These bits of information will give you topics that you can ask her to expound upon. You can say “How do you feel about that?” or “what’s the story behind that?”
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When you’re on a first date, it’s easy to get all caught up in demonstrating, what a fine, strapping male you are. Don’t forget that you’re also evaluating her worthiness as well.

One important thing that you must know about your date is compatibility. If your interest is establishing a long term relationship, then there has to be something that the two of you are on the same page about.

A previous post discussed how to keep conversation flowing on a first date by being focused on and remembering interesting and unusual things that she happens to say.
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Believe it or not, you don’t have to have the good looks of a movie star to get women. Women are turned on more by masculine traits and personality rather than just looks alone. But this doesn’t mean you that you can let your appearance go. Maybe I am stating the obvious here, but there are guys out there who are clueless about looking after their personal appearance. I happen to know a few.

Here are a few suggestions that will improve you appearance:
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For some, the idea of getting more skilled at socializing with strangers, approaching, attracting and dating women can be a scary prospect. It only seems that way because you’re imagining yourself doing all of those things right now. Remember that you will overcome shyness gradually by taking many small steps along the way.

Imagine the first day at a new job that you have little previous experience for. If you were expected to assume your full responsibilities right away without training, it would be a disaster.

But with time you find yourself easily mastering the responsibilities of your job. You might even think back at how unnecessary it was to be nervous during your first few days.

This is true with mastering any new skill. Socializing and dating are nothing more than skill sets and can be learned like any other. You only need the will to go ahead and just do it.

More suggestions to help you:
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