If you’re constantly telling yourself that you need to learn how to talk to girls, you’re approaching the problem the hard way. In fact, viewing it as a problem that has to be overcome will turn it into internal battle with yourself.
The harder you try to start a conversation with a girl, the more tense and nervous you’ll get. You might get the words out ok but the girl will immediately pick up on your nervousness and if she’s a stranger, it probably won’t turn out well.
A better way is not to take it seriously at all but instead look at it as being an exciting and fun game. Rather than telling yourself that you just got to figure out how to talk with girls, tell yourself that you’re going to learn how to be a really great flirt. See the difference? The second way is more empowering. It’s ambitious. Ambition is good.
Think of this as a fun new hobby. Because it’s a new hobby, you’ll realize that you won’t get proficient in a day but will GRADUALLY get better with practice. You’ll be practicing on strangers that you meet whether at the store, mall, or at social occasions.
When you do this you won’t care about the outcome one way or the other because it’s just a game and it’s with strangers that you’ll never see again anyway. As long as your behavior isn’t outrageous or insulting, no harm is done either to you or the girl. It’s just harmless fun. Repeat that sentence to yourself as often as necessary: It’s just harmless fun.
When you get a girl to laugh and talk with you, it will be intoxicating. Believe me, it will lift your spirits like nothing else can. After that first success, you’ll want to do it again, maybe with the same girl or maybe with someone else.
Remember to inject fun and playfulness into your interactions. Flirting is playful behavior intended to arouse sexual interest. Don’t worry about the sexual interest part, just focus on the playfulness.
There’s another benefit to playful, humorous flirtation: it not only makes you desirable to the girl that you’re flirting with, it also elevates your status among the other women who may be watching. This is called social validation. These women see that another woman is enjoying your company. So in their minds, you must be a fun and interesting guy.
Good flirts make other people feel special and enjoy doing it. It builds confidence, can make you a lot of friends and is a playful way to safely test the waters when it comes to romance.
It’s important that all of your focus should be on making the girl respond in a good way. Absolutely none of your focus should be self conscious. Always keep your mind directed outward to the girl. Remember that if you can make others feel good, you will feel good.
Tags: how to flirt with a girl
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Im jus a 19 yr old guy dat wants 2 learn how 2 approach a girl wen I meet her
first see the girl and just gave her simple smile and then move on talk to her and say that your face or physic is too similar to your friend.
just be simple and act in ur normal behaviour.
dont try to show off.
Am 21 yr of age,i have come to know why many girl move away from me,its bez of poor communication/flirt,how can i approach them and come back to me again??
man you don’t know that a very beautiful girl is my school.no one can say no to her if she ask you something but i am trying the way flirt. it working or not i acn’t say about it but her best friend has benn a little attracted.so this was it.thanks for this help.
once i was chting with a girl in my university for 2 or 3 hrs and it went on very well but next day when she saw me she did nothing ,not even a saying ‘hi’ and when i see this i did nothing too and didn’t go through her,, did i make mistake? and why girls are this way?
@tohi – Most likely she was waiting for you to wave or say hello first. If you are waiting for her to do the same thing then nothing happens. She may even be wondering why you passed right by her without even a hello just like you are wondering right now about her. Girls are like this because men are expected to initiate interaction. You are a guy so you will have to wave first and take the small risk that she may not wave back.
this is good.i got a girl
@dibesh – Way to go!
tohi if u cant say hello infront of all then atleast u have to pass a simple smile !!!!
Was inlove with someone and she ddnt seem to have intrests in me, I had to show and tell her and yes I did but she ddnt even care.how do I deal with that sh*t
Brothers. There’re ways of approaching girls cos they’r different from we guys. First get to know her not just coming to a girl and asking or requesting for her mobile number. It’s really bad and most guys do this.
I’ve never asked any lady out and anytime I try to do so, I always get afraid due to lack of confidence. What can I do? I need your advice
I take it you have no problems conversing with girls and that the problem is getting up the nerve. If so, then you can try asking her to do something with you that isn’t a big formal date. It could be something like going someplace nearby for lunch (if it’s lunch time) or getting a coffee. You can gauge whether or not to ask on the basis of whether she is enjoying your presence or if she is “signaling” disinterest such as her never making eye contact (unless she is shy), or acting fidgety and trying to walk away from you while you are still talking. So if she’s enjoying talking with you and especially if you’ve had more than one pleasant conversation with her, then try asking her to do something small like what I mentioned previously.
there is a girl i like her very much she kinda doesnt like me and doesnt take any interest in me she always just wants to be friends not anything else. So wat should i do.
@robin – You should spend less time fixating on her and be seen with other girls. By being seen I simply mean chatting and interacting with them. This gives you something that is called “social proof”. This means that she and other girls who notice will see that you seem to be “popular” and this will make you more attractive to them.